Lately I’ve noticed myself resting a lot.
Taking it easy.
Connecting to friends. Giving and receiving hugs.

Letting go of the idea that in order to get somewhere, I have to work hard first.
A notion that seems quite epidemic in our society.

Very ironic, because what is it that we want to reach?
A state of completion? The end goal? Success?

And how will we feel when we reach that goal?
Rested and at peace perhaps?

Being a good boy

Fuck it, I’m taking the shortcut.
I don’t feel lazy though, I’m just deciding to throw years of programming to the wind.

Years of being a good boy, working hard, and especially: believing that life ain’t easy.
Because: “Watch out, feeling good is dangerous”.

Oh, and: “You have to do it all by yourself”.
And: “You’ll never be good enough”.

Being a person

I don’t know about you, but most people I meet believe these things at some level.
Working so hard for a little bit of love, and some scraps of inner peace.

Until at some point you just feel burned up, wrung out, exhausted.
Tired of trying to be a somebody. A person in this world.
Wearing your mask.

Do you recognize this?

How would it be to feel safe enough to drop the charade?
To “just” be yourself, as you are, without hiding how you really are?
To be real?

What we already are

As you know, that’s what I’m all about.
Because being real equals being natural.

Being natural is being without effort, without trying so hard.
I believe most of our efforts are in order to feel loved, and seen, and safe.

And the idea to work for years and years towards some goal on the horizon
that might never actually happen, feels sad.

“I just need to finish this, and then I’ll give myself permission
to be happy and at peace…”

“Right now I’m just not good enough yet. This and this and this needs to change,
and then…”

Wow…can you feel it?
So yes, how about a moment’s rest?

How about realizing that what we are is not what we do?
And what we are, is already the case. We can’t work towards it.
We can only allow ourselves to realize it.

Ahh…

I once asked a friend of mine:”How do you know you’re enlightened?”,
and he answered:”That’s the same as asking a duck to prove it’s a duck”.
It’ll just answer by saying “Quack”.

We are all, already “enlightened”:
Natural. Real.
We just don’t realize it yet.

Deep rest

So back to taking some rest.
I’m not so much talking about lying down, sleeping, doing nothing,
though that can be part of it.

What I mean with resting, is allowing yourself to stop doing things
that feel like work,
and allow your actions to arise from inspiration, enthusiasm and a sense of:
”This is what I want”.

Now before you start saying that’s impossible because of all your obligations,
just check in with yourself: Does it resonate?

How would it be to live a life in which you follow your inspiration,
all of the time?
How mind-blowing would that be?

And all your obligations: who put them there in the first place?
Were you sleeping, and then suddenly: ”WTF?”

Inner compass

I believe that wherever you are right now,
it’s possible to create more space for your real self.
To live in a way that feels good, and to use your feelings
as your compass.

Yes, it’s actually allowed to do things because they feel good,
and for that reason alone.
Can you give yourself permission for that?

Watch out: Tiger!

I know for me that’s been -and still is- quite a mind shift.

We’re so programmed to put in lots of effort before we
allow ourselves to be happy.
“Something might go wrong if I don’t work hard!”

Yet, you are still here, after all these years.
You still exist. Despite of all your fuck-ups and failings.
You are here, and you are ok.

Without any imminent threat to your life in this moment.
And if not, what the fuck are you doing reading this?
Get up and run!!!

Let’s connect

I always enjoy a good conversation.
I like knowing what you think and feel.
So I will thank you in advance for your comments 🙂

Speak soon!
Roald

10 gedachten over “Could I have a moment’s rest please?”

  1. I get a feeling reading this that there a strong resistance against some things in your life. It makes me think of I my philosophy that I kind of shared here before, your story makes me feel really strong about it, facing resistance in life. My believe; That achievement is life and an end in it itself, joy of what I am able to do, work hard if I want to, take my responsibility in my work, for my life. To live is a choice, to live is to think, accepting all that comes with the choices I made and consciously chose to work on things that bother me. I have peace with what life throws at me in a deep sense, I have to handle it, standing strong receiving it fully, there are no shortcuts to escape. Everything I face is my responsibility and mine to own. Standing this strong in my responsibility of life, carefully navigating. I see lots of people avoiding any responsibility in work, personal situation, relationships. It makes me crunch, for f*ck sake take the gift called life and conscience.

    Reading back you’re blog again I see resistance with social pressure and inner motivation through it. I’m curious what my rand made you feel.

    1. Hi Michel,
      First of all, thank you for your honesty in expressing how you feel after reading my blog.
      I do recognize there are things in my life I feel resistance towards,
      and I have seen myself struggling with being motivated.

      The approach I’m learning to take, is to be more deeply ok with all aspects of my life.
      For me, this results not in motivation, but in inspiration.
      It might come across as not taking things on, but for me it feels very transformational.

      Apart from that I imagine this article touches a belief of yours that you have to work hard
      to get where you want to be. If so, I understand it can stir up quite some resistance.

  2. What a beautifull article about just live your life. For years I listened to all the fears of others: don’t quite your job because of this and because of that. Be responsabele for your kids etc. But mainly I felt unhappy and I knew that if I want to change that and listen to my body, I have to change the pattern. So I am taking a break and trust in the universe and watch which Doors will open for me.

  3. Hey Roald,

    Beautifully written.
    I agree with what you write.
    And next to that:

    For me there is another reason to work my ass off at times.
    After a period of resting more into what is and connecting to my core, I usually feel very inspired and motivated to contribute something to this world. I just feel so extremely grateful to be here and to have the possibility to make this world even more amazing.
    I just feel like adding a little more beauty to it, day after day.

    It feels like a natural circle, turning inwards and outwards.

    1. Yes exactly!
      You working your ass off comes from inspiration and excitement.
      So though it might seem that I’m advocating chilling out, this is what I’m talking about 🙂

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Being authentic, dropping the masks of social conditioning, and being the unique man that YOU are.

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—FOUNDATION OF THE MEETUPS—
Every meeting aims to create a deeper sense of brotherhood, and a stronger embodied presence in each man participating.

Being authentic, dropping the masks of social conditioning, and being the unique man that YOU are.

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Every meeting aims to create a deeper sense of brotherhood, and a stronger embodied presence in each man participating.

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